Word Problem
by yomibitorazo
Summary: Revised, oneshot. Modern math problem in Sengoku Jidai


**Word Problems**

"Sesshoumaru-_sama_ is walking-"

"Where is he going?"

"Irrelevant. Sesshoumaru-_sama_ is walking-"

"Is Rin with him?"

"_Hai_, she is; and so is Jaken-_sama_ and Aun. No may I continue?"

"_Hai_!" came the happy reply.

"Sesshoumaru-_sama_ and his companions are walking when their path is suddenly obstructed."

"What does 'obstructed' mean?"

"Past tense of obstruct; obstruct: to block, to be in the way. Their path is suddenly obstructed by _juusan_ _youkai_. Jaken-_sama_ told them to move, but they refused. Sesshoumaru-_sama_ dispatched, past tense of dispatch which is to... permanently remove, _san_ _youkai_ as a warning to the rest. _Ichi youkai _ran away; how many are left?"

"_Juu, iie, kyuu_!"

"_Yoku deshimashita_! The remaining _kyuu youkai_ refused to move so Sesshoumaru-_sama_ cut down _yon_ more. As Jaken-_sama_ belittled, past tense of belittle, means to make fun of, them the _youkai_ who had run away returned. How many _youkai_ still block the path?"

"_Roku_!"

"_Hai. _Sesshoumaru-_sama_ got rid of _go_ _youkai-_"

"_Ichi_!"

"_Hai_. And _ichi_ remained. It was the _youkai_ who had run. Suddenly, there were _nana_ _youkai_ behind Aun."

"_Hachi_!" 

"Hai. The _youkai_ had run for reinforcements, backup-"

"A futile effort."  
  


"Futile- useless. Sesshoumaru-_sama_ used his _youki_ whip on the newly arrived _youkai_ and Jaken-_sama_ roasted the _ichi_ remaining _youkai_ with _Nintoujou_. How many _youkai_ did Sesshoumaru-_sama_ teach a lesson."  
  


"_Ichi_!"  
  


"_Soo desu ka_?"  
  


"_Hai_! Sesshoumaru-_sama_ killed _juukyuu_ _youkai_ and Jaken-_sama_ killed _ichi_, the _youkai_ who had run. And because Jaken-_sama_ presumed," a black eyebrow rose at the word, "to kill the _ichi_ that Sesshoumaru-_sama_ spared, Sesshoumaru-_sama_ taught Jaken-_sama_ a lesson!"  
  


"Ahh... This happens often?"  
  


"_Hai_!"  
  


"What is the purpose of this?"  
  


"To teach Rin-_chan_ math. _Dooshite_?"  
  


"Do Sesshoumaru-_sama_! Do Sesshoumaru-_sama_!"  
  


"Such things are beneath this Sesshoumaru."  
  


"_Soo desu ka_? Or are you afraid I'll make it too hard for you?"  
  


"_Ningen_ are inferior to _youkai,_ especially a _taiyoukai_."  
  


"Does that mean you'll do it?"  
  


"..."  
  


"_Onegai shimasu_, Sesshoumaru-_sama_. It's fun!" the little girl pleaded.  
  


"...Don't pause."  
  


"But of course. Okay, you, Sesshoumaru-_sama_, are a _coachman_-"  
  


"Ridiculous. This Sesshoumaru would never be a coachman," he spat the last word.  
  


"It doesn't matter; it's just hypothetical!"  
  


"I, Sesshoumaru, Lord of the Western Lands, would never be a coachman."  
  


"Fine! You, Sesshoumaru-_sama_, the great, powerful, almighty, and conceited-" he growled, she glared whilst continuing, "-_taiyoukai_ and Lord of the Western Lands, are going to war."  
  


"_Dooshite_?"  
  


"_Nani_?"  
  


"Why am I going to war and with whom?"  
  


"Argh! It doesn't matter! Read my lips: it is irrelevant!"  
  


"..."  
  


"..."  
  


"..."  
  


"Gah! You're so noisy! You are going to war with Naraku because he called you a cross-dressing sissy who is getting it on with Jaken! Happy?!"  
  


"...'Getting it on'?"  
  


"It is not an appropriate thing to discuss in front of a child," she spoke primly.  
  


"You will explain this later."  
  


"Maybe," he raised one finely arched eyebrow questioningly. "Only if you stop interrupting."  
  


"Agreed."  
  


"Good, now just listen. You are going to war with a force of _ichimanyonsenroppyakunijuuni_ _youkai_, yourself included. In the first battle _ni _generals, _yon_ captains, and _yonsenrokujuusan_ soldiers die, _hyaku_ deserted, _gojuunana_ joined Naraku, and _sanjuuni_ joined the side, and don't even think of interrupting.  
  


"In the second battle reinforcements of _happyuakunijuusan_ arrived, roughly _nihyaku_ _youkai _were fatally injured, _sensanbyaku_ were killed, _zero_ deserted or went to Naraku, and _nanajuugo_ switched from Naraku's side.

"In the third and final battle, _senhyakujuuichi_ recruits arrived, _nisenyonhyakugojuusan_ _youkai _died, and _juukyuuu_ deserted when the outcome looked bad. How old is the _taiyoukai_ leading the attacks?"  
  


"Who won?"  
  


"You won, okay? Now stop stalling and answer the question."  
  


"_Hassenyonhyakugojuugo_," came the ready response.  
  


"Wow, you're old," she smirked.  
  


"...You think you're so clever."  
  


"I know I am. Don't give me that look. Hey, it's your own fault for assuming to know the question. Get away!" She took off running through the gardens, followed by the excited squeals of Rin and a mischievous Sesshoumaru.  
  


He grabbed for her as she tripped, taking him down with her. They landed in a heap, still for a moment trying to take in what had happened.  
  


Sesshoumaru's head lifted from her shoulder. He looked down into her sparkling sapphire eyes, the look in molten gold ones softening. She raised her head from the ground and sweetly kissed him.  
  


"_Ai shiteru.._"  
  


"_Ai shiteru, _Kagome."

**_Owari_**

**Translations:**  
  


-_sama_... honorific title  
  


_hai_... yes  
  


_iie_... no  
  


_youkai..._ demon(s)  
  


_Yoku dekimashita..._ Very good.  
  


_youki..._ demon energy (I think), similar to _jaki_  
  


_Nintoujou_... Jaken's Staff of Heads  
  


-_chan..._ affectionate term used for females and small children  
  


_dooshite_... why?  
  


_Soo desu ka_... Is that so? Really?  
  


_nani_... what?  
  


_taiyoukai..._ great demon  
  


_onegai shimasu..._ please do it for me (in this case)  
  


_ai shiteru... _I love you  
  


_ichi_... one  
  


_ni_... two  
  


_san... _three  
  


_yon... _four  
  


_go... _five  
  


_roku... _six  
  


_nana... _seven  
  


_hachi... _eight  
  


_kyuu... _nine  
  


_juu... _ten  
  


_juu kyuuu_... 19  
  


_sanjuu ni_... 32  
  


_gojuu nana_... _57_  
  


_nanajuu go_... 75  
  


_hyaku... _one hundred  
  


_nihyaku_...two hundred  
  


_happyaku nijuusan_... 823 (From here on, I assume these are correct.)  
  


_sen..._ 1,000

_sen hyaku juuichi_... 1,111

_sen sanbyaku_.... 1,300

_nisen yonhyaku gojuu san_... 2,453

_yonsen rokujuusan_... _4,063_

_hassen yonhyaku gojuu go_... 8,455

_ichiman yonsen roppyaku nijuu ni_... 14,722  
  


Completed:  Thursday, October 9, 2003

Edited:  Tuesday, February 3, 2004


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